The many faces of Carter

Teah's latest phase

With the kids so far I've learned that everything is a phase - the good and the bad will all pass. All summer Teah had gotten into a really good groove. She was for the most part very polite and easy going. Before that had been a "screaming phase" where she was just screaming about everything that would happen. It was strange because one day is just ended and she was so well-behaved. I was hoping this well-behaved Teah wasn't a phase, but a permanent disposition - unfortunatley that was not the case. About 3 weeks ago we entered another screaming phase. Actually it's more of a defiant phase this time around. She can't handle it at all when we tell her she can't have or do something that she wants. She wants to do everything by herself even more than before. Numerous times we've found her with the gallon of milk and a cup on the floor about to try to pour herself a drink. The funny thing about these "bad" phases is that they always seem to happen when Teah has shown a big change and started doing things that she hadn't been doing previously. You would think that she would grow and change gradually and we wouldn't really even notice, but it seems to be more that in a week she just starts doing all sorts of new things and understanding things in a different way - this is when she enters the bad phases. I can see that probably numerous things started this one rolling - she realized she could open the fridge by herself, she was finally brave enough to go down the slide at the mall, she started writing her name, and she started preschool. So, I guess she's just dealing with the new idea of her "big girl" self. Check out the picture below - it's the first time that Teah has drawn a real picture. She drew the sun all by herself, colored the sky blue, and added the grass at the bottom. I think it's some sort of developmental milestone when children start drawing pictures with a bottom (ground type of area). I drew the outline of the cow and she added the face and ears. Notice the piece of grass that Teah drew up to the cow's mouth :)

An eventful weekend

So, we rarely have many functions to attend, but this past weekend we had two in one day. Addison's 1st birthday party (Mike & Lindsey's daughter) and a BBQ thrown by one of the few other residents that has a child. Carter was getting over a bit of sickness or perhaps just a reaction from his vaccinations, so there was no way he wasn't getting a full nap that day. So, Teah and I headed out to Addison's birthday party and left Robert at home to laze while Carter napped (for 3 1/2 hours). It would've been nice for everyone to see Carter, but it was also very nice to just have Teah. She's very easy to deal with by herself, especially when we're at a house with toys, a playset in a fenced backyard, and a friend (Austin) to play with. Here's a picture of Addison in the hairbow I got her (love the little girl things! - I tried it on Carter in the store to see how it looked :) and the best one I could get of Austin and Teah. It's impossible to get them to both look at the camera. Funny that in this picture they look like they're dating LOL.

Addison's 1st Birtday!

Teah and Austin

I hated having to leave the party early, but Teah and I headed out to pick up Robert and Carter and go downtown to our next function. The kids took a little break in the van and ate some chicken nuggets on the go. The BBQ was fun and the kids were both great. Carter was obsessed with the closed bedroom door, behind which he could hear the barking dogs. Teah was hilarious - She found a little piano and decided to get everyone's attention (there were like 15 people there) and proceed to sing along to one of the songs with the attached microphone. She really isn't shy. The kids didn't get to bed until 9:30pm, but we all survived and actually had a great time!

A flu shot please?

Teah was with me yesterday when I went into our local grocery store pharmacy to get a flu shot. It told her I was going to get one and she said, "Mommy, I want a flu shot!". I told her that only grown-ups could get flu shots here and she would have to get one at her doctor's office. She seriously argued with me for 2 minutes about wanting one right now! :) I'm sure she'll change her mind once she actually gets one - I guess she doesn't remember last years...

Teah's 3rd Day!

Well, I'm sure that I won't blog about every single day of preschool, but today was a pretty good one. The kids were a little challenging getting ready to get out of the house, so I'm glad that they day turned around.

On the preschool calendar for today was "wear red". So, Teah picked out a red shirt and wore her red shoes. I dropped her off at 9am as usual and didn't even come back to peek in today. It was a beautiful fall day, so I let Carter walk most of the way home to get out some of his little energy. He stopped every 5 feet to point at something - a stick, a leaf, a plane in the sky, a bird in the sky, a dog walking by, the trees, the grass :) Then I'd tell him what each thing was and we'd talk about it (by we of course I mean me). It was really great to have time with just the two of us so I could slow down and watch him explore the world! It's amazing to watch him learn about the world.

After our walk, Carter and I went to the mall and I was finally able to use a gift certificate I had for Mother's day and buy a few gifts that needed to be bought. I even found a pair of jeans that fit me and I like rather quickly. We came back to pick up Teah a little early and I watched the end of class. They were using glue sticks to make a big construction paper Clifford the Dog - I'm guessing because today's theme was read and he's the big red dog. They had done a little worksheet that day that had three sets of two pictures. For each set they were supposed to color the item that was red. They had also been given a blank piece of paper with the instructions to draw something for mommy. The teachers had written next to all of the scribbles what the kids had said they were drawing - it was really cute. Teah had written her name for me. Teah also used scissors for the first time to cute out a little lady bug craft.

When I picked Teah up Mrs. Kassanders let me know that Teah was starting to test out the rules. She didn't want to pick up at clean-up time and had told the teachers, "I don't want to". She also hadn't flushed the toilet after going potty and when the teachers asked her to she covered her ears. I talked to Teah about the flushing the potty. She told me that her teachers had to help her and she had covered her ears - the teacher and I were both thinking she had done this to try to act like she wasn't listening to them. I told Teah that covering her ears wasn't a very nice thing to do with her teacher. Thankfully she explained that she doesn't like how loud the potty is so she was covering her ears because of the noise. Of course that made sense once I heard it because she always as to cover her ears before we flush whenever we're using a public potty. So, I ran back and talked to Mrs. Kassanders about her not liking the noise and that's why she was covering her ears! Mrs. Kassanders was just really excited that we had discussed it and figured it out together - I think she was really happy about having some parent/teacher communication going on.

It's really fun to have Teah tell me about preschool afterwards and I'm pretty surprised by how much she tells me and remembers about her day. The 3rd day was a good one!

Silly Pasta

Teah has always made up her own names for things. For example, she calls Target "the ball store", Toys R US "the S store", and string cheese is "white cheese", english muffins are "circle bread"... the list goes on and on. Well, we had farfale (bowtie) pasta for dinner yesterday. Teah decided to call them SILLY MUSTACHE PASTA! I thought it was hilarious and definitely my favorite self-named item :)

Teah's 2nd Day!

Teah had her second day of preschool yesterday. I didn't cry this time, although I was pretty emotional when I left and I did return 30 minutes later to peek on her. I needed to grocery shop, so at that point I decided to commit to being gone the rest of the time (no more peeking!) and Carter and I headed to Trader Joe's. It was nice to shop with just one child. We got back to pick Teah up a little early, so I was able to peek in on the last 10 minutes of class. The theme of the day was new friends and they were coloring a picture of two little kids hugging. The names of the 5 kids were written around the outside. After coloring they sang a song for each kid - inserting their name into the song and pointing to that person, then glued a picture (I'm assuming they'd taken and printed out earlier in the day) underneath the right name. It was really cute.

Teah seemed to have a great time for the 2nd day as well. I'm waiting for the day that she throws a tantrum about something, but maybe she only reserves those for me :) She told me about their snack and about the toys that she played with. Mrs. Kassanders told me that she was really impressed with Teah's ability to listen to the songs they were playing and memorize them quickly, keeping well with the beat. She mentioned putting her in a music class or something since she seems to really like it. Teah always tells me that she wants to play the piano when she grows up, so next year I'll have to look into lessons - when she's a little older and we have a little more disposable income!

Well, it looks like this preschool thing is going to work out and I am even starting to look forward to 2 1/2 hrs of time with Carter.

Teah's 1st Day!

** Picture: Teah in front of her cubby**


Teah had a great time at her first day of preschool! We walked over to be there by 9am. Teah hung up her coat and backpack in her cubby and went right in. We took a few pictures (check out our photo album - http://hilliard.myphotoalbum.com/ - for more) and Carter and I stayed for a few minutes. Teah immediately went in and starting playing with a pretend castle with a little boy in her class. There are 5 kids in the class right now, but last year they started out with 6 and ended with 15. Other than Teah there are two little girls and two little boys - Dima, Rodeena, Basel, and Marco.

After a few minutes I went over and told Teah that it was time for me to leave and asked her if that would be OK. She said, "yep", and kept right on playing. So, I made her give me a kiss goodbye and left (see blog below for my reactions :). I ended up peeking in (without her noticing) through the door 2 times - once Teah was playing happily with the dolls and the other she was in the girls bathroom. One of the little girls was screaming the first time I peeked in, obviously upset being away from her parents. With the second peek she seemed to have fallen asleep sitting on Mrs. Kassanders lap.

When I picked Teah up they were out playing on the playground. I talked to Mrs. Kassanders for a few minutes and she told me that Teah had done well. I guess she dawdled a little at clean up time, but not too bad. We went down and picked up her papers - she had colored a picture of a school that had a poem attached about the first day of school. There was the calendar for the month, which basically just tells you the topic for the day and a few other things. For example, Thursday's theme is "New Friends", next week Tuesday they are supposed to wear red, and the Thursday after that they're supposed to bring an apple.

After we got home I asked Teah questions about her day and she did a great job answering. She told me that they had raisins and crackers for their snack. When I asked her if she had something to drink she told me that she didn't like the orange juice so her teacher had dumped in down the drinking fountain and she had thrown the cup in the trash. I asked her if all the little kids had been happy and she told me that one little girl was sad, probably because she wanted to see her mommy. When we read the little poem attached to the picture she colored that talked a little about being scared and wanting to go home when you're at school, Teah told me that she hadn't felt that way :) Sounds like a great first day of school!

Mommy Reflections

Teah started preschool today. I can't believe I thought that I might not cry. :) She goes Tuesdays and Thursdays from 9am-11:30am and right now it's 11:06 as I'm writing this. So, I'll have to blog about how her first day went for her later in the afternoon. I, on the other hand, have spent the last two hours reflecting on my own emotions.

I made it through the actual dropping her off with just a few moments of glistening eyes, but when I walked out of the building I sat on a park bench, gave Carter some breakfast in his strolled, and cried. Once I had my moment I realized I didn't know exactly when to pick her up - was it 11:15 or 11:30? I couldn't remember. So, back to the front desk I went. Teah's preschool is in the basement of the building so I decided that I needed to peek in after chatting with Dee (working the front desk) for a few minutes - it was 9:30am. Both of the doors were closed, but they have little windows in them. I peeked in and saw Teah happily playing with a doll. There are only 5 kids in her class right now and one little girl was crying for her Mommy. Teah seemed oblivous to this :) After peeking I lost it again and had to take another "moment".

"Making the decision to have a child - it's momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body."

~Elizabeth Stone

When I dropped Teah off in her room there was a maintenance man working in one of the rooms next to it and it made me uncomfortable. I thought, "Who is this guy? Do they know him?" I realized one of my first emotions of leaving Teah was fear. The quote above is exactly it - my heart was in the preschool and I wasn't there to protect it. I love the preschool and trust the teachers and know that it is as safe as it can be, but it's hard to get over the paranoia and worry. That made me think about how hard it must've been for parents (in general - I don't feign to even begin to know how those close to the situation felt) to take their children to school after Columbine - I had never really thought about it from that angle before.

I was the only one at the preschool who was dropping off my oldest child for the first time. The teachers gave all of the parents a little note with a baggie stapled to it filled with a tissue and tea bag. The note told us to go home, dry our tears, make a cup of tea, and relax. :) They could tell it was hard for me and they called and left me a message letting me know that Teah was doing fine (Carter and I were having breakfast at Burger King). The funny thing is, that's not what I'm worried about. I know she's ready and she'll do great with me not being there. I've always known that this was going to be harder on me than her. I wondered what it was then that made me so emotional and I realized it was because I always know what she's doing and now I don't. And honestly it's not a control thing. The fact is that I'm going to be missing some of her "firsts" and happy moments. I'm not going to be the person there to witness the good times and help her when she's upset. It's only 2 1/2 hours for 2 times a week and I know it's what she needs, but it's definitely part of my sadness just not being there with her.

A Big Step for Carter

Well, I finally think that at 15 months Carter is ready to fall asleep by himself for naps and bedtime. It's been a long and tiring journey, but I'm excited today that he's finally ready. If you're interested in the long and tiring journey, keep reading...

Carter didn't sleep more than 5 hours at a time until he was 9 months old - and often he would wake up every couple and need me to come into the room. At 9 months I just couldn't function any more without a good nights sleep. I wasn't being the best mom because of how tired I was, so I decided to let him cry it out. I had been rocking him to sleep up until that point, but I guessed the reason he kept waking up was because he didn't know how to put himself back to sleep. I HATED doing it, but was desperate for sleep. Thankfully the first two nights Robert slept upstairs and dealt with Carter while I slept downstairs in the basement with lots of background noise - I really can't handle the sound of my kids crying well. For almost 2 weeks we let Carter cry himself to sleep to go to bed and when waking in the night. After only 3 days he was sleeping 11 hours through the night without crying anymore, but at the end of the 2 weeks he was still crying for 10 minutes to fall asleep. For numerous reasons I started rocking him back to sleep again and thankfully his good nighttime sleep continued.

Since that point I've put him to sleep for naps and bedtime by rocking him with a bottle. I've always enjoyed rocking him to sleep for the most part, but I knew it would have to end at some point. There's a lot of "Mom pressure" out there to have your kids put themselves to sleep at a young age and to nix the bottle at 12 months, so I kept feeling like I needed to do something about the rocking and the bottle, but it worked for us and I enjoyed that time Carter and I had. I debated numerous times just trying the crying it out again, but we stuck with our routine for the most part. Once a week or so I would end up putting him down awake just because I couldn't get him to fall asleep and he would cry for 5 or 10 minutes to fall asleep. Last week I encountered one of those naps, so I did the usual and laid him down awake, fully expecting the usual crying, but it didn't come. He talked for a few minutes and then fell asleep! Right before this he had stopped screaming whenever he woke up in the mornings and from naps and instead would just babble until I came to get him. So, these two things made me decide that he was ready to put himself to sleep.

Today for naptime I kept mostly the same routine, except I gave him most of his bottle downstairs and just the last few ounces upstairs while rocking. This achieved a sleepy, but not quite asleep child. I laid him down sleepy, but awake - he sat up and I said my good night and left. No crying and he was asleep in 15 minutes! At bedtime I did the same thing and he was asleep within 5 minutes without a peep. I'm glad he's finally there and continue to think that if I just have the patience to wait until my kids are ready for something and don't give in to what everyone else tells me I should be doing, it'll work itself out.

Nobody's Perfect...

I lost my temper today with Teah and later I apologized for getting angry and yelling. It happens to the best of us with 3 year olds. When I told Teah I was sorry she said, "Don't worry Mommy, everybody makes mistakes sometimes". I know it's something she's memorized to say, but it was really cute.

Carter's Stats

Friday was Carter's 15 month appointment and here are the stats:

Weight: 23lb7oz - 34th percentile
Height: 31 1/2" - 60th percentile

Well, the doctor actually measured Carter at 32 3/4", but they measured him very quickly while trying to get him to lie down on that table with the crinkly paper. I've taken to measuring him myself at home - the doctors measurements are always WAY off! Three months ago he weighed 21lb13oz and was 30 1/2" long - he's a growing boy, that's for sure! The rest of the appointment went pretty well for 15 months. It's a bad age because they are old enough to know what's going on, but not really understand it. Teah's 15 month appointment was the all-time worst. She cried when anyone would even just walk in the room. She cried all the way home and then threw up her bottle all over me because she was so upset. I thought it would never get better, but by the time she was 2 I explained what was going to happen and she did great. Carter definitely cried when they would poke him or prod him or get too close to him, but he stopped quickly. The poor guy had to get 4 shots and of course he screamed at that, but it didn't take long until he was happy again. Overall a good appointment with a happy, healthy little guy!

Chef Carter

Carter has always been a fan of cooking. It started when he first discovered the pots and pans in the kitchen and would bang them around. Now he loves to pick out a pot and walk over to the counter and point up until I give him a big plastic spoon. He'll put some pretend food in the pot, shake the pretend salt and pepper over it and stir it all up. He has a little pretend grill as well that he puts pretend food on, squirts on pretend ketchup, and uses the little flipper. Not only is his favorite playtime with the food and pots, but he loves to watch me cook. If I put something on the stove he doesn't give up until I pick him up and let him watch. Often he'll sit on the counter while I prepare dinner. This kids is seriously obsessed! Maybe we'll be calling him Chef Carter someday... I'm attaching two videos of him helping me make the salad for dinner last night :)

Preschool!

Teah starts preschool next week and today they threw an open house. The idea was that parents would stay for the hour for the kids to get comfortable before next week when they're on their own. I found out that there are only 6 kids signed up for the 3 year old morning class - 4 girls and 2 boys. Teah turns 4 in December and I was worried that she would be much older than the other kids in her class, but there are 2 other kids whose birtdays are November and January, so I felt good about that. Only one other little girl came to the open house, but it was really good. I was able to talk to Teah's two teachers, Mrs. Kassanders and Mrs. Linnville, for awhile while the kids played. They both have four kids of their own. Then we had story time and Mrs. Kassanders read a book about school and another about a racoon who was afraid to go to school, but whose mommy kissed his hand so he could carry her love with him. I kissed Teah's hand and she gave the kids a little heart sticker to put there. It was very cute.

Pic: Teah's ready for her preschool open house!

When Teah and I first started talking about preschool at the beginning of the summer she would tell me that she was scared of preschool. We talked about it and we went to visit last year's class right before they finished for the year. After that visit when Teah saw all of the toys she wasn't scared anymore! She also watches a Wonder Pets episode where a baby blowfish goes to preschool and doesn't want his mommy to leave - they sing a song about her always coming back. So Teah has a really good understanding that I'm not going to be there with her - she seems really comfortable! The last step was her using their potties all by herself today while I was there. They have two bathrooms - one for girls and one for boys. The doors are always open and there are two stalls inside with potties that are tiny for the little kids to sit on. I thought that I would be sad about her going, but I'm really excited for her. She's so ready and I know she's going to have a great time and learn great skills. I'll report next week Tuesday on whether or not I cried :)

A Good Loser...

Teah recently got a new game called Zingo - it's basically a bingo game, except you turn over tiles and you take the tile and put it on your card. Two cards can have the same item, so if one is turned over you have to be the first one to pick it up or else you have to wait for another one. Teah kept winning every game she played. Sometimes people were letting her win, but then we all started trying to win and she was still winning! When Robert and I were playing with her Robert took a tile that I needed before I could get to it. I made a comment and Teah said, "Don't worry mom, you don't have to be sad. You can just wait for the next one". Now I'm thinking how well she's going to play this game - I was a little worried with her being 3 years old and all. Well, the next tiles were turned over and Robert took a tile that she needed. She burst out in tears! We were able to get her interested in the game again, but it looked like Robert might win. We told Teah that having fun was the most important thing and that when Daddy won she should say, "Good Job Daddy!" and give him a high five. Well, Robert won and Teah said, "Good Job Daddy" and she gave him a high five. Then she thought for a second and burst out crying. "But I wanted to win", she cried. I guess we still have our work cut out for us when it comes to being a gracious loser!

A Sack Race!

This was a priceless moment!

Labor Day Weekend

What a great weekend! My parents and in-laws both came to town to visit. The kids loved seeing Nana and Papa and Grandma and Grandpa. We went to the mall on Saturday and then grilled out and watched the old Roger and Hammerstein's version of Cinderella (I love those songs!). The kids stayed up a little later than usual and actually slept in Sunday morning. We went to the zoo Sunday which is always fun. Something memorable always seems to happen with the animals and everytime we go it's always a different one. Once we saw the sloth bears climb all the way up the trees in their exhibit (which I don't think they're supposed to be doing). We've seen monkeys screeching and the tiger swimming through his lake. This time around we saw a polar bear dive from a rock into the water. It was really cool! We had beautiful weather the entire weekend and it was great to spend time with family.

Carter and Grandpa happened to be wearing the same shirt one day, so we made Daddy put one on and took some pictures!

Sunflowers

Teah and I planted sunflower seeds in our backyard this summer just after memorial day. We've watched them grow all summer long and now they're about 8 feet tall! Teah and I have watered them and watched them bloom. Tuesday evening we pulled off one of the flowers that was starting to wilt and about to fall. I had read you can harvest the seeds out of the middle and when I looked at the flower I couldn't see how there were going to be seeds in there. But sure enough when I pulled off the little green parts overtop of the middle of the flower, nestled in were a bunch of sunflower seeds. Teah helped me pick them out and now we're saving them to give to the birds this winter. We opened a few and ate them raw and Teah even tried them. The smell of them fresh from the flower was great. I have really loved this summer project with Teah!

One is the Easiest Number?

Well, Robert was post-call today and had enough energy in him to watch Carter while I took Teah with me to the grocery store. This got me to wondering how I ever thought having only one child was hard. I know it was because I went through it, but now that I have two I can see it's just a matter of perspective! I often take both kids with me grocery shopping and it definitely is not a simple task. Only having Teah with me today, even though she was acting up, was a breeze. And I used to complain about having to take only Teah before Carter came along... once again, there's that perspective.